I feel myself fading out again. Sometimes I’m not sure which one I’ am anymore. They all tend to blend together at times, one thing’s for sure, I’m not looking through my eyes, I'm looking through theirs. Some argue whether people like me know of the others or if the others are completely separate. I can say with most certainty. It is both. I know that I’m not in control. I hear people talking to me but I’m between places, the gray zone, that fuzzy area where I can still somewhat see and hear my surroundings but tend to lose time. Sometimes I’ll sit and eat and look through the “others” eyes and see my body eat. So strange. I always make an effort to regain myself but it feels so weird at times and that eeriness will push me back, away, because it’s so foreign. Almost like the one that is there says, “Ah ahhh, no no, it’s my turn”. “When did I eat most of my dinner, didn’t I just start eating?” I think to myself fading back out just as quick as I faded in. He’s not happy, I can see that plain as day from here. He senses something. Can’t others see that? It’s odd how humans are so numb to others. This one has always wondered if others could see the change, hmmmm. "Trust no one, they are all liars. When are you going to get that through your fucking head? I tell you and tell you and you never listen. You are always trying to see the good in people, but there isn’t any. They lie to you they lie to themselves, and they lie to their preacher and God. The ones that lie to themselves are the worst. They stand there knowing they are lying but will fight to the death defending their bullshit lies. Some are so convinced that their self made lie is the truth that they will die for it. Unless. Yes. The funny part is, unless they are confronted with the truth, then, then my friend they will get all defensive, accusatory trying to justify themselves. But they are never, never at fault. But hey, even if they did admit the truth, when confronted of course, then you would be a pussy to fall for it and accept their weakness. Remember, you already knew anyways. Transparent people, they might as well wear a sign on themselves. They can’t hide it. None of them can. I’ll tell you this, if you didn’t know the truth, they wouldn’t have told you the truth. Wait, what's that you say? It doesn't bother you? Silly man, you can read everyone else so well but you cannot read yourself!" "If the meaning behind the truth didn’t bother you, then I’ll ask you one simple question…" "WHY" "AM" "I" "HERE?!"